March 1st marks a special day for me. It marks 12 years living in New York City. 

Twelve years. 

That is the longest time I've lived in one place in my adult life. 

The first time I came to NYC, I was in 8th grade. Our school came down from three hours in Upstate New York for a trip to Ellis Island. We had been studying immigration at the time.  I remember being on the ferry, and muttering under my breath:

“I’m going to live here someday.”

When I first came to NYC, it wasn’t under the circumstances I thought they would be. When I imagined myself living here. I thought it would be working as a copywriter, in a building in Midtown. 

Instead, I was arranging playdates at the park,  juggling snacks, carrying a stroller up the subway stairs.  It wasn’t my time yet, but I said under my breath: 

“One day, I’m going to give birth to my dreams here.” 

When the time for me to finally actualize my dreams came, I made many mistakes. Learned alot about myself and others. Instead of giving up on my ambitions and playing it safe. I muttered under my breath:

“I am going to flourish here.” 

While I've taken some pivots from where I thought I would be on my journey, New York has always been the backdrop for creativity, inspiration, and hope. 

New York, for some people, is a pit stop. I’ve often heard people have conversations about how long they plan on living here. 

Till they finish their Masters, finish their internship, finish their gig at the new startup.

People ask me when I think I’m leaving New York. My answer is always the same:

“I’m not leaving New York unless I’m in a body bag.”

People always laugh at that, but I’m serious. I’ve always wanted to live here, build a life, here, and I’ve done that. New York is my home. She was never a destination, never a parasitic relationship where I take, and take from her and never give. 

This city has given me so much. 

So much grace. 

So many opportunities. 

So...much..Joy. 

In turn, I’ve given her

The best of my creativity

The best of myself

My  unwavering loyalty

My love. 

I will never leave her. Especially in her darkest hour. She is mine, and I am hers. 

New York is not dead. New York is forever.